Tawab Sukhera (Ethologist)
A Comically Honest Guide to Pug Breeds: Retro vs. Standard
So you’ve decided you want a pug. Great choice. You’re bringing home a snorting, waddling, relentlessly unapologetic clingy life. Before you open that door to all that whirlwind love, you’ll want to know—there are two kinds of pugs you can choose from.
Let’s nose-first (okay, I couldn’t resist) into the great differences between Retro Pugs and Standard Pugs.
Retro Pugs: The Vintage Edition
Imagine someone picking up a pug, reversing time, giving its nose back, and saying to it, “Go ahead and breathe like a normal dog again.” That’s the Retro Pug.
They’re the hipster of the pug world. They have longer noses, fewer breathing problems, and just enough wrinkles to look wise without being a towel in disguise.
Why Retro Pugs rock:
- They actually breathe without sounding like a broken vacuum.
- Their faces have room for air to flow.
- Fewer folds to hold snacks, lint, or mysterious material.
They’re basically what happens when you love pugs, but also love low veterinarian bills.
Standard Pugs: The Classic Couch Kings
Standard Pugs are the OG. The pug you’ve seen in royal portraits, viral memes, and possibly dreaming about croissants. With a face flatter than a pancake and eyes that can see into your soul (and fridge), they’ve charmed humans for centuries.
Signature traits:
- Nose? Let’s just say, more “suggested” than present.
- Big, round eyes that say, “Please drop that snack.”
- Tails so curled, they could win a ribbon-twirling contest.
They’re adorable, cuddly, and feature sound effects—primarily snorts and snores.
Where Did These Pugs Even Come From?
True Pugs trace back a long, long way. We’re talking about ancient Chinese emperors, monarchs’ lapdogs, and invited guests to royal tea parties. By the 16th century, they were jumping onto ships for trade to Europe, where aristocrats and artists couldn’t possibly live without them.
Retro Pugs are a bit of a throwback to today. Breeders saw the respiratory issues caused by too-flat faces and thought, “Let’s head back to the good old days—of air.” Therefore, Retro Pugs are bred healthier but still have their pug-ish charm.
The Face-Off: Retro vs. Standard
Nose Length
- Retro: Actual nose. Functional. Makes wind sounds when it’s breathing.
- Standard: The nose is modest. Perhaps in disguise.
Wrinkles
- Retro: Charmingly placed.
- Standard: Folds up enough for an ironed sheet.
Eyes
- Retro: Alert and curious.
- Standard: Far too cartoonish, always set to glare at your dinner.
Health
- Retro: Built to breathe, to jog, and perhaps even stair-run.
- Standard: May need a half-yawn road trip pit stop.
Who’s Better at Being a Dog?
Retro Pugs
- Playful, energetic
- Intelligent, inquisitive, and keen to learn tricks (or at least try)
- Laid back with children, other pets, and pretty much everyone except squirrels
Standard Pugs
- Experts at cuddling and doing absolutely nothing
- Love human attention—preferably while lying down
- Share space with people, furniture, and take up just the right amount of space on your pillow
Grooming: Low Drama or Full Spa?
Retro Pugs
- Bathe monthly or whenever mysteriously smelly
- Brushing of teeth is mandatory, or they’ll get halitosis that can kill friendships
- Ears need to be cleaned infrequently, ideally before they develop their own environment
Standard Pugs
- Baths happen often; wrinkle cleaning is required
- Brushing twice a week keeps fur from accumulating on your wardrobe. most of the time
- Wrinkle gunk exists. Clean it, or it might become self-aware
- Teeth brushing and ear maintenance are not elective
Training: Can Either of Them Learn to Sit?
Yes—if snacks are involved.
Retro Pugs
- Somewhat more athletic, with enough energy to stay engaged during training
- Concentrated and relaxed enough to follow commands (eventually)
Standard Pugs
- Will perform tricks. slowly. if they’re in the mood. or the treat is high-smelling
- Generally motivated by food, belly rubs, and couch applause
Top tips for both:
- Patience: Training a pug is a sitcom, not a boot camp.
- Rewards: Treats. Lots and lots of treats. Consider them edible Wi-Fi.
- Encouragement: Pugs respond to praise, in part because they think you’re their biggest fan (and you probably are).
Mythbusting Time
Myth: Pugs don’t need a lot of grooming.
Reality: They shed like it’s their side hustle. Go get a brush.
Myth: Vintage Pugs have no health issues.
Reality: They’re healthier than regular pugs, but still pups—so, vet visits ensue.
Myth: Stock Pugs are lazy.
Reality: They’re energy-sipping. Like a Tesla on sleep mode.
Are Pugs Right for You?
If you’d want a dog that:
- Bugs around like a plush toy come to life,
- Is great with kids, cats, guests, and probably houseplants
- Can be house-trained on snacks and excessive praise,
- And adjust to apartment life as well as they adjust to your lap—
- Then either pug variety could be your new soulmate. Just consider the health differences, snout shape, and grooming needs before deciding.
Final Thoughts: To Snoot or Not to Snoot
Retro Pugs are the healthier template—slightly longer noses, longer frames, and more breathing room.
Regular Pugs are the squishy-faced originals—sweet, squishy, and kinda wheezy.
Either one, you’re getting a dog with a gigantic personality in a tiny, snuggle-friendly package. Pick wisely—and while you’re at it, grab a lint roller
